Sunday, December 14, 2008

Hello! Yes.


Wow!  this is something I do not remember, but great!

Anyhoozle, I went to dinner tonight with my B-S-Friend (that's boy-sex friend for those who aren't up on the lingo) at his parent's house.  Good times y'all!  

And, the highlight of the day was making my usually stoic co-worker actually laugh pretty hard today.

So, I work at a certain coffee shop in a certain city in Minneapolis. 

So, some guy comes up to the counter, and me wanting to be the great (GREAT) employee I am, asked what I could get for him; dialouge follows:


Me: what can I get for you?
DouchBag Customer (DBC): Do you have Christmas blend?
(Note: We always brew this coffee, at this point we do not have this coffee brewed and we are having miscommunication)
Me: Oh, no, we're not brewing that right now.  We have pike place.
DBC: what?
Me: Pike place.
DBC: pike....what?!?
Me: PIKE PLACE
DBC: PIKE....?
Me: Pike.
DBC: Like a pike? like the fish?
Me: Like pike place market.
DBC: So, what quantities does that come in?
Me: Oh, so you want beans, not brewed coffee?
DBC: (Rolls eyes dramatically and breathes heavy as about to have some sort of heart attack and or brain problem), Yes, that's what I was looking for!
Me: Well, than, yes we do have christmas blend.



The short and short of it is that he got his coffee, but the whole time after we figured that out that he wanted coffee BEANS, he was trying to explain that it was for his wife and "what the heck, I don't know"

And my angry response that I told my co-worker made her laugh, and made me laugh after, and I think it's the best angry response to anything and that is:

Ew, I can't believe he's married and someone let's him put his penis in them!!!! If he can get married, than I can get married~  Margo.

AMAZING!

I can't beleive someone let's him put his penis in them.  Remember where you heard it bishes!

Friday, December 12, 2008

You Still There?

I'm not able to sleep right now. 
Yes, I am planning on going into a profession of helping people, but I heard and experienced something today to really make me question my choice of career.  
I can't get incredibly detailed, but I will say that I was on the phone for an hour and forty-five minutes with someone who would give me minimal information, a minor and threatened suicide (somewhat understandably IMO) no less than four times.  This person cried, silently, and I believe was in serious trouble, and there was nothing I could do.
What could I do?
Yell?
Berate?
Tell her she was lost without me?
No.
There was nothing I could do, I was powerless.
Now I can't sleep, because I know that somewhere close there are a lot more like that one call.


It's horrible.
How can I feel any hope knowing there so many horrible, disgusting, devil people that exist?

I'm too tired to post the link, but if you see this, please go to thisamericanlife.org and download (for free) herectics.  It's about a minister who realizes hell doesn't exist because it's already here and there's no fear of "going down there".  Please let this be your one act of selflessness for the day. 

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thanks...giving?

Today was Thanksgiving.  Hooray!  Quick rundown of how the day went thus far (it's only 4:00 so there may be another post to come):
Went to work at Starbucks at 930, got my ass reamed by 1,000 customers, pretty much all of whom ordered five or more drinks at a time...not cool.
Yelled at my boyfriend when he wasn't at work to pick me up, told him I was going to murder him. Par for the course, eh Ladies?
Got to my Mom's house, grubbed, wined, talked, got sleepy, left.  Mom gave me some grief when leaving and told me to go to the gym tomorrow (Thanks mom, I'll always think of you when putting my fingers down my throat to be "perfect".  Ha, we all know that doesn't happen. Tastes good going down, not coming up).
And, finally, here I sit at boy's house drinking a beer, smoking a bit and giving y'all the rundown.

I hope you all great Thanksgiving and let's not forgot to love the ones we're with.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Yes, I am Fucking a Genius

So, I have this shirt that says, "I'm a Fucking Genius" but now I'm dating a boy who is a Genius at the Apple store.  I have fallen in love with the shirt all over again because now when I wear it all I can think is, "I'm Fucking a Genius".  Thus, this will be a shirt I will have to make and own until our relationship falls apart, and hopefully at that point the shirt will have as well.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

So fuckme!

Yes,
I have started a blog...lame for me.
I can't spell.
I don't have too much of a sex life.
My family is pretty awesome (minus the other half that's kinda fucked).
But hopefully,
you'll validate me in some way,
is that what this is for?
ugh, better one next time.